Essentially, healthy Yin energy is necessary for Optimal Fertility.
While I share Yin-Supportive methods and ideas in my blog posts, I feel called to share more about what this energy FEELS like. Unless we can feel Yin, it can almost be like we are going through the motions in a very Yang way.
I’m going to share my experience of Yin in the hopes that you can continue to explore how it lives in your body.
To me, Yin feels like Flow.
When I am in my Flow, it feels like I am moving slowly and languidly through life, experiencing pleasure and sensuality and joy. When something “comes at me,” as things do in life, I can experience it fully, witness myself feeling it, and then use my deep womb-intuition to guide me, fully trusting that no experience is “too much” for me to handle, that all perceived hardship is just an opportunity for me to grow.
I am rooted and grounded, in my heart, in my womb, in my body. I dance easily, I laugh loudly, I feel alive and sexual and embodied. I notice the wind and the trees and the sounds of birds. I don’t resist. I flow around the things that don’t provide me with pleasure or joy or sensation that feel rooted in my body.
I feel deep love and care towards people. I want to offer my heart and share my Wisdom, but feel deeply resourced, knowing that my boundaries are clear and strong. I don’t need to put up unnecessary walls. I know intuitively in each moment what I’m willing to give, and what I’m not, based on an internal YES or NO. I embrace darkness as much as I embrace light. Shadows and darkness and depth intrigue me. I know that there’s magic in our most hidden places, and I revel in the exploration. I feel no fear, because even death is life.
Trust me, I don't live in this place all the time, but when I feel stressed or agitated or out of flow, it's a reminder to me that my Yin needs nourishing.
I understand that often when trying to get pregnant, we may feel fear, worry, shame, distrust of ourselves and our bodies, worried that we are going to be taken advantage of, worried that we may never conceive, that something is wrong with us.
I’m asking you today to see if you’re willing to put those feelings aside, even for a week to start. You can come back to them. They will be right there waiting for you if you want. For now, imagine putting them on a shelf. You know they’re there, and they will remind you that they’re there. They will pop into your head, but at least for this week, try to tell them NOT TODAY.
Wake up each morning this week, and remind yourself that you’re practicing pleasure. Practicing feeling. Practicing sensation.
Your mind will get in the way. You will tell yourself that you need to be DOING something, fixing something. You will think that focusing on the “problem” will help you find the solution. Of course you can and should continue to drink your teas, massage your bellies, use your Moxa or whatever else you’re doing to support your fertility. And then LET THE WORRY GO. This is enough for now.
If it feels impossible, remember that it’s just a week. You can do anything for a week. If you absolutely can’t, try for just a day. One day.
How To Being Flowing in Yin
* Perhaps start with self-touch. Touch and rub your belly, your breasts, even your face. Especially your pussy. (Yes, I use the word pussy. I love it)
* Perhaps let yourself be touched and caressed by your partner without the goal of pregnancy, just for pleasure.
* Put on a favorite song. Feel what it feels like to move your body, from the inside. Don’t worry about what you look like. No one is watching. Let yourself feel.
* Enjoy your favorite food, slowly, sensually. Savor every bite. I imagine eating red juicy cherries and letting the juice run down your face.
* Find a favorite friend to laugh with.
* Start paying attention to your internal knowing. All of us (Yes, even YOU) have a deeply-wired system for knowing what feels good and right to you. We ignore it all the time, so what we feel is expected of us instead. Begin by listening, feeing. Then honor what you feel. Forget “shoulds.” Decline an invitation if it’s not appealing to you. Don’t spend time with people who make you feel badly. Seek pleasure.
*Remind yourself every morning, every hour if necessary, that this week is about finding your pleasure.
I recommend one of my favorite books, an important book by Adrienne Maree Brown, Pleasure Activism.
I'll leave you with an all-time favorite quote by Audre Lorde: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”